October 10, 2019. I know I need to lose weight.  I’ve done the up and down since 8th grade.  I’m now 43.  But the thought of adding one more thing to my “to do” list, one more thing to think about was more than I could handle the past few years.  It was so much easier to grab something quick, or to snack on, or to cook a delicious thin crust frozen pizza.  Until it wasn’t.

Here’s what hasn’t been easy:

  • Saying no to walks and to bike rides with my daughter for fear of not being able to get on the bike, for fear that I’d embarrass myself, for fear that the next few days my knees and feet would be in pain.
  • Asking for the seatbelt extender on airplanes and being uncomfortable in every seat with arms on it that wasn’t wide enough for my hips.
  • Standing on stage and teaching for hours and knowing that I’d hardly be able to move the next day.
  • Trying to get off the floor.
  • Having to think about all of these things instead of just doing, instead of just moving.

So much space in my mind is taken up with questions and ‘what if’s’ and ‘I cant’s’ because of my health. So much space that could be used for God’s glory, for my family’s joy, and for my personal enjoyment.

Here’s what I know to be true. Psalm 139:14 says that I am “fearfully (respectfully) and wonderfully made. God’s works are wonderful.  I know this full well.” God loves me just as I am, at whatever weight the scale says. That will never change. Does he care about my weight? Yes. But not because of how I look to the rest of the world. He cares because he cares about my health, about my energy, about my physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. And he cares about my fulfilling the plan that he has for me to do on this earth.

So, if God is asking something of me, and there is something that is keeping me from doing what he’s asking, keeping me from living my very best life, then absolutely yes; I need to make a change. He wants to walk alongside of us as we work towards change. Change is hard. Change is a process, and change is not easy. But dealing with change, and trusting that God is going through it with us every step of the way, makes it doable.

Romans 12:1-2 from the Message version says:

“So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.”

So I’m going to get over the number on the scale.  I’m going to own this number, and not let this number, or any number, to define me, but by acknowledging it and proclaiming it, I’m hoping it will be the start to freedom over my life; freedom I will find from being a healthy me.

Here we go; I weighed myself this morning, and the scale, as of 8:30am on Thursday, October 10, 2019 says 291.4.

291.4 lbs., girlfriends!

What barrier do you have in your life that you need to name, own, and work on overcoming?

Let’s deal with the emotion, embarrassment, shame, and eye rolls as I ask myself how I let myself get this far? How have I not learned my lesson yet at age 43? I know what to eat to lose weight. I know the choices I should make. And yet, I don’t make them. What will make this time different?????  This time, I’m choosing to live my life as a sacrifice. And that includes doing what I can, with God alongside me, to be healthy enough to honor him and thank him for all that he has given me and all that he will provide for me in the future.

I cannot lose weight the way I have in the past. It didn’t work. I need to do it as an offering to God. So how is this time going to be different? I’m going to be focusing on growing my faith, and growing my understanding of who God is, and the plans that he has for me instead of focusing on things in this world.

This year I am committed to losing 100 pounds, and reading the entire Bible or chronological order. I intend for this year to be transformational. I trust God with this plan. I trust God will give me lots and lots of grace in this journey, cause I have no doubt that I am going to need it!

Each week, I will weigh in on Facebook “live” at 8:30 AM CST on Thursdays. I’ll be sharing on live and in a written post, about that week’s journey, what I’m learning, what I’m struggling with, and scripture that is keeping me encouraged. Do you want to join me? Name your number. Take a picture of your feet on the scale. Name what your barrier is, whatever it is. Let’s get it out in the open, so we can head into freedom.

I’m not here to promote a certain kind of weight-loss program. There’s plenty of good quality ones out there. The truth is that God has provided us with fresh fruit, fresh vegetables, proteins, and quality whole foods. I intend to eat those things, and sprinkle in the other non-nutritious foods in moderation. This week, I encourage you to study Romans chapter 12, read it silently, read it aloud, Take a piece of paper and write words that stand out to you in that chapter.

I also recommend reading the following scriptures this week as you begin to choose to live into the future God has planned for you as your healthy self:

Romans 8: 5-17 from the Message version:

“Those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life. Those who trust God’s action in them find that God’s Spirit is in them—living and breathing God! Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into a spacious, free life. Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God. Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God, ends up thinking more about self than God. That person ignores who God is and what he is doing. And God isn’t pleased at being ignored.

But if God himself has taken up residence in your life, you can hardly be thinking more of yourself than of him. Anyone, of course, who has not welcomed this invisible but clearly present God, the Spirit of Christ, won’t know what we’re talking about. But for you who welcome him, in whom he dwells—even though you still experience all the limitations of sin—you yourself experience life on God’s terms. It stands to reason, doesn’t it, that if the alive-and-present God who raised Jesus from the dead moves into your life, he’ll do the same thing in you that he did in Jesus, bringing you alive to himself? When God lives and breathes in you (and he does, as surely as he did in Jesus), you are delivered from that dead life. With his Spirit living in you, your body will be as alive as Christ’s!

So don’t you see that we don’t owe this old do-it-yourself life one red cent. There’s nothing in it for us, nothing at all. The best thing to do is give it a decent burial and get on with your new life. God’s Spirit beckons. There are things to do and places to go!

This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It’s adventurously expectant, greeting God with a childlike “What’s next, Papa?” God’s Spirit touches our spirits and confirms who we really are. We know who he is, and we know who we are: Father and children. And we know we are going to get what’s coming to us—an unbelievable inheritance! We go through exactly what Christ goes through. If we go through the hard times with him, then we’re certainly going to go through the good times with him!”